Baby Steps

Ever since getting over my formula stigma, I've felt so much lighter. I've still been nursing Vi, but also introducing bottles of SnuggleMilk. And last night was notable in that I dropped the bedtime nursing -- Vi was so totally fine with it. Which means, now we just nurse in the morning. I don't have to juggle evening plans around nursing. I can stop wearing nursing bras. I can put my pump away (that, my friends, will be a welcome goodbye). The transition has (knock on wood) been so easy that it looks like I will be able to stop nursing altogether in the next week or so, before I leave for BlissDom. Knowing me, I'll want to stop right at Violet's 11-month mark. Easy to remember. Easy to hold on to.

Other little but big feeding things have happened too. The other week, Laurel and Vi enjoyed the same snack together for the first time (pictured) -- one snack box! Last night, they both ate the same macaroni and cheese -- one step closer to making them the same dinner! Vi still doesn't have teeth, but she can definitely squish whole blueberries (even big ones) with her gums -- one less thing for me to cut up!

All of these things seem like such minor little baby steps but they also make me incredibly nostalgic. I can't believe Violet's birthday is next month. Despite my grousing about pumping, I can't believe she will stop nursing soon. I can't believe she will be walking soon. Last weekend I visited with my friend Nicola -- as I cuddled her 3-month-old son, it felt so trite but I kept thinking, "Really? Was Violet ever this teeny tiny and fragile seeming? She's such a big baby panda bear now."

These days I've been a little distracted as Violet's upcoming birthday brings with it some bigger and unresolved and painful issues I have with one of my family members. But I'm trying to not fret about what I have come to realize I cannot fix. Some days are easier than others. Either way, I look around, feel gratitude, and focus on the baby steps.